So I started a new project. The idea literally came out of nowhere, but a first line popped into my head so I figured the muse or whatever was trying to tell me something!

This particular project will be an epic poem. Before I seriously started to write prose, I focused a lot more on poetry. In fact in the period in my life when I was hospitalized most of my creative output was in the form of poetry.

I’ve been trying out new forms and generally just learning. There’s something about poetry that calls to me. Perhaps it’s because it’s generally short and I have a notoriously short attention span. XD

Everything in the Book

Both of the major times I was hospitalized I came out with many different diagnosis. To be honest there is one I’m still not feeling comfortable with and I only found about it four years ago when my old counselor visited here to release my papers.

I’m not going to lie that I sometimes wonder if the doctors aren’t inflating things. Perhaps I’m listening to my grandma a little too much, but idk. For example the illness that I spoke of is PSTD. I still think…I can’t have that. I’ve never been exposed to something traumatic.

But as I read more about it, I find myself getting uncomfortable. My home life…wasn’t the best. But it wasn’t the worst. I’m still hesitant to call it traumatic. But yes now I remember certain things. Stuff that I don’t feel comfortable with confronting especially with my new enlightened relationship with my mother. But confront them I will have to.

I’m currently looking for a new mental health provider. My old one is alright, but I don’t think they are equipped for all of the services I need at the moment. I hate to leave them though. I’ve always been afraid of change.

 

Oop

As usual I stayed up all night. Normally this isn’t a bad thing as I usually go to sleep during the day. But what I failed to realize around 3 am is that I have an assessment today at the mental health center. And as usual I am starting to get tired.

I could have avoided this but as usual I wasn’t thinking ahead and as I’m wont to do I forgot.

So today will probably be spent with me being cranky at everyone even though I could have easily avoided this. Ah the perils of living inside my head.

The Ivy Lessons by S.K. Quinn Review

The Ivy Lessons (Devoted, #1)The Ivy Lessons by J. Lerman

My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Okay so I started reading this yesterday. I picked it up because I needed something to take my mind off my appointment and how nervous I was. It certainly did.

I immediately noticed that not only does this book seem to be a rip off two books (Twilight and Fifty Shades which of course was a fanfiction of the former.) It also seemed a bit cliche. I mean Sophia is innocent and she seems like Bella in that she gives backhanded compliments especially in the first few chapters of the book. I mean she describes her friend as blonde and chubby and then says she wishes she looked more like her. Sophia describes herself as tall and willowy. I laughed out loud.

The Ryan and Cecile characters are so damn one dimensional. I found myself thinking about Cecile. What made her tick? Why was she after Marc? Why was she so mean other than to give Sophia a rival?

Ryan? Piece of shit. You don’t fucking drug someone that you like. Like what the fuck? He should have been fucking arrested. Oh and if I’m not clear, you don’t drug anyone. Period people.

The rest of the book followed the structure of Twilight. I mean Marc is even described in Edward terms. Pale skin. Dark circles under his eyes. LMAO. And then early in the book he leaves after encountering Sophia. So Twilight.

The sex was…really kinda vanilla. I’ve read harder sex in some of my single title romances. I mean despite the BSDM elements, it still seemed very vanilla.

But I will give it to the author that this book entertained me. I made me much calmer before going in to see the doctor. It wasn’t badly written though I did catch a mistake. And it is cliche. But it was a light read and like I said I enjoyed it. So I actually think I might buy the next book. I want to find out what happens, I can’t help it.

So I rec this if you need something quick and light to read.

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Currently Reading

Home Girls cover The Girls Guide to Everything cover

Hey guys! I’m still reading over on my end and of course buying more books haha. I actually bought a few more books than I usually do at the local Walmart. But it’s been a whole year since I’ve been to Barnes and Noble and I let my membership expire…oops.

But anyway I’m currently alternating between these two books. I started Home Girls yesterday. One essay in particular really spoke to me and how I feel as a black woman in America. The author says that she has no connection to her African roots because her ancestors weren’t allowed to keep their old rituals. I’ve been feeling like this a lot. I would love to know what country my ancestors were from and what were their customs. Maybe one day when I have better finances I can find this out with that DNA testing ha.

The second book I bought yesterday. I’ve just decided to study more seriously for the GED test and I want to attend college. I want to make a better life for myself, you know? I bought this book because of the summary and plus I’ll admit I sort of have a thing for self-help books haha. I can’t help it alright!

So anyway that’s what I’m currently reading. What about you guys? Anything interesting? Let’s talk about it!